Yesterday was Horse Riding in Le Boren. Drive 2 hours up into the foothills of the Alps and there you find a lake, full of wild trout. Peel slowly around the corner there are 15 to twenty horses, all with riders, all waiting for us... we are late. Very late and very stressed. I don't realise how stressed my love is till I see her face as she comes in to the pound 3 minutes behind me... I have already met the guide, whose name I never caught, and the owner Dennis, a US Twang in his voice, he looks like a miner from a Eastwood Western....
I am mounted before I know it... The beast is big but funnily there is no sensation of vertigo... I feel strangely comfortable in the saddle. I have never learned to ride, the last time I was on a horse, was a hunter stallion 15 years ago and I couldn't wait to get off. This time I felt at ease.....
Our Guide.....ha ha what a woman, apparently her father is Sicilian, she was about 25, wild eyed, blue, curly hair stuck to her head. No shower for 3 days..perhaps..or rained on that morning?
I am trying to find our Contact an English woman. I don't succeed, I am mortified we are so late, I apologise ineffectively, nobody really cares, I can't see my love. I don't think she wants to talk to me...I don't mind..I call out to her anyway..she hasn't prepared, isn't comfortable. She feels it deeper than I and shows it. I just talk to my horse, to anyone, who will listen..we are walking....its easy comfortable, good....we are trotting, not comfortable ....not easy, not good, stop woah slow down...my horse breaks into a gallop..Holy shit.. I am terrified..I have no idea what to do. There are some Comedians from the city, they know less than I but don't show it. The shout and roar a gee up the horses for all they are worth laughing their heads off..... Finally the horses walk again...whew....that wasn't nice...my love is not happy... I am regretting the feeling like I pushed her this morning.....I don't want her to give up or in, ever...she's done enough of that. Recently she has found new force, new voice. It is a thing of beauty but I am afraid of her slipping back....she doesn't look happy.... I can't see her now. We are in single file up a narrow almost invisible track through the trees. Our guide calls out 'A droite' the horses duly oblige...I have made an aquaintaince, she is 'horsey set' English, The horse's are climbing, we are swapping jokes back and forth, she is right behind me... we are coming out of the trees, I hear her calling hold on, hold now just hold on, I don't understand. The two horses in front of me bolt out of the tress, gone...shit I hold, I have the reigns in one hand and the mane...Oh shit...my horse DejaVu is up and out like a shot and off with a Gallop I turn I see Jupiter(my English friend) looking shocked her horse had bolted too. I know my love is next but I can't see her and I am afraid for her...I shout loudly to her to hold on, to be ready, breathe don't be afraid. I can't see her, I cant turn the the stupid beast around..and out of the trees she comes, fear on her face, her hat falls to the ground and is trodden her horse is flying...my horse doesn't let me see the rest. I get to turn around when all is calm...her horse has backed into saplings..I can see horses people, I know there is panic but I know little else(later I find out the horses were walking on a wasps nest, and our friend fell off trying to help my love, she hurt her arm but not badly)...and then there is calm...we are off again.. I know this is the last time will we be on horse back and I had such romantic notions of it...We are off... this is a gallop, I have picked up to stand up in the stirrups and I try shit it works..wow...I get it, I manage to make the horse go left and right as she runs wow this is cool ....a white horse flies past a crazed with joy face turns and those blue eyes pierce me..my horse decides to move up about 5 gears....OH good god in heaven and all that's holy I hope I have a change of underpants, I am going to need it if this keeps up...Our French sicilian guide laughs at me, she mocks me laughingly and all I can do is agree... There is no point in being macho and trying to hide what she saw on my face. It spelled shear terror..I can tell you exhiliration has taken on a new sense in my dictionary...
We rode for 3 hours.. the two comedians were eventually forced to walk back as our guide lost her mind with them for abusing the horses and moaning and complaining the whole route but mostly for whipping the animals..they refused to dismount. She was screaming they were refusing...I have a deep voice and bellowed..one dismounted straight away...2 minutes later she was at the other one, the same insane fury...I have felt it, been it harnessed it and learned from it and it was then she was ingraved in a part of me. I finally saw in someone else a fury born from passion that meets pig ignorant laziness. It's a sight to behold... I belowed again, easily, this time perhaps my look helped more than my voice. I took little notice I could now turn the horse where I wanted...... I could make him trot.. amazing. I passed up on the last Gallop afraid for my love so I stayed with her, and nervous for myself so it was easy, so do did our contact who I think is a wonderful woman, another horsey set..... Look at me, the Irish Rebel hanging out with the English horsey set and loving it..Thunder was rolling around the hills now, war like clouds swathed the mountains and the first Drizzle I have seen in France in 4 years fell. I was in Jeans and T Shirt and I was blessed lovingly by Mother Nature. But the striking thing at the end of the day, were the views, to be in a place no car could be, on horse back, hips swaying in time, back straight, and a small smile curling on the lip, all quiet...wow....That and that my love is determined to take riding lessons so we can go again...gidy up...away.
Surprisly my ass and balls are not in the slightest bit sore, I must have been doing something right... ;)
Penhaligon’s Elizabethan Rose EdP - 2018 and other Rose-isms
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4 comments:
Wow, what an account!! Sounded amazing :)
It was :-) Welcome on board :-)
I'm sorry, Warrior, but over the years I've come to the conclusion that all horses are bastards. Mind you, so would I be if I was one and had to put up with the tap tap tap of someones balls on my back...
hahaha ..............sound like a good reason for the liberation of all... ;)
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