Thursday, September 25, 2008


There is a game they play here called Ni Oui ni Non. Niether Yes nor No. You have to answers questions and you are not allowed say yes or no? Do you understand? Ah see I win!
I feel that is what is happening in my desire to have my son more with us.

Today my lawyer called while I was in middle of something important in work.
I had to move quickly outside. I answered, closing my eyes dreading this moment.
I had no idea if I should prepare to jump for joy or to sink to the ground and yet neither response would have been correct anyway.
Even if it was the perfect result the right response would have been perhaps a sage nod of the head, a satisfied smile, maybe a secretly clenched fist of joy. Nothing more than that or it would not have been right.

For the moment my ex has my son, I get to see him every second weekend offically. I stop paying for his Canteen and his schooling and I stop buying him clothes and I pay her 200 euro a month.
In the meantime there will be a social inquest in how Lover and I live in our home. We agreed to that before I had to go to court.
My lawyer explained this is the first step in the Shared parenting. If the result of this inquest is positive then there is no court that can refuse the Shared parenting. So I suppose all in all it's a good result, it could have been worse. There is still light. I am just not able to cut that rope that binds me yet and that honestly irritates the hell out of me. I have a desire for finality.

My body is getting better. I have changed physio's by accident almost. The new physio and I have become friends. The other one was brilliant and so is this one. But this one gives me more. Will strengthen my body. I will be healed soon. I will be back on track.

So I guess the result of today is neither no, nor yes. Change or no change or waiting or slow change. I will know more when I meet my Lawyer soon who will explain the ruling in detail.

But I have had a lot of support from my readers, and for that I am very grateful. So this is the news you have been waiting on. Sorry it's not more conclusive.


Anonymous said...

Sometimes it's best for things to be neither black nor white... I hope this particular shade of grey works for you. I'm in awe of your strength -this must be the hardest thing a family can survive, but you're holding it together with such optimism. Well done mate, keep fighting.

Miss AJ said...

It is a positive point moving in to the future. I've had friends that have been inquested (?) when adopting children and it is quite reassuring that the best interests of your child are being given similar care. Very best of luck in this next step.

Moni said...

I beleive in my heart that it will work out for you and the boy. He will be a strong man, like his father, by the example you are seting for him. You are fighting for him and not giving up. You want what is best for him and sees it and sences it. It will work out beatifully!!! I admire you and your courage!!!

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